little dorrit-信丽(英文版)-第59章

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his　walk；　and　passed　through　the　meadows　by　the　river　side。　He　had
that　sense　of　peace；　and　of　being　lightened　of　a　weight　of　care；　which
country　quiet　awakens　in　the　breasts　of　dwellers　in　towns。　Everything
within　his　view　was　lovely　and　placid。　The　rich　foliage　of　the　trees；
the　luxuriant　grass　diversified　with　wild　flowers；　the　little　green
islands　in　the　river；　the　beds　of　rushes；　the　water…lilies　floating　on
the　surface　of　the　stream；　the　distant　voices　in　boats　borne　musically
towards　him　on　the　ripple　of　the　water　and　the　evening　air；　were　all
expressive　of　rest。　In　the　occasional　leap　of　a　fish；　or　dip　of　an　oar；
or　twittering　of　a　bird　not　yet　at　roost；　or　distant　barking　of　a　dog；
or　lowing　of　a　cow……in　all　such　sounds；　there　was　the　prevailing　breath
of　rest；　which　seemed　to　enpass　him　in　every　scent　that　sweetened
the　fragrant　air。　The　long　lines　of　red　and　gold　in　the　sky；　and　the
glorious　track　of　the　descending　sun；　were　all　divinely　calm。　Upon　the
purple　tree…tops　far　away；　and　on　the　green　height　near　at　hand　up　which
the　shades　were　slowly　creeping；　there　was　an　equal　hush。　Between　the
real　landscape　and　its　shadow　in　the　water；　there　was　no　division；　both
were　so　untroubled　and　clear；　and；　while　so　fraught　with　solemn　mystery
of　life　and　death；　so　hopefully　reassuring　to　the　gazer's　soothed　heart；
because　so　tenderly　and　mercifully　beautiful。

Clennam　had　stopped；　not　for　the　first　time　by　many　times；　to　look　about
him　and　suffer　what　he　saw　to　sink　into　his　soul；　as　the　shadows；　looked
at；　seemed　to　sink　deeper　and　deeper　into　the　water。　He　was　slowly
resuming　his　way；　when　he　saw　a　figure　in　the　path　before　him　which　he
had；　perhaps；　already　associated　with　the　evening　and　its　impressions。

Minnie　was　there；　alone。　She　had　some　roses　in　her　hand；　and　seemed　to
have　stood　still　on　seeing　him；　waiting　for　him。　Her　face　was　towards
him；　and　she　appeared　to　have　been　ing　from　the　opposite　direction。
There　was　a　flutter　in　her　manner；　which　Clennam　had　never　seen　in　it
before；　and　as　he　came　near　her；　it　entered　his　mind　all　at　once　that
she　was　there　of　a　set　purpose　to　speak　to　him。

She　gave　him　her　hand；　and　said；　'You　wonder　to　see　me　here　by　myself？
But　the　evening　is　so　lovely；　I　have　strolled　further　than　I　meant
at　first。　I　thought　it　likely　I　might　meet　you；　and　that　made　me　more
confident。　You　always　e　this　way；　do　you　not？'

As　Clennam　said　that　it　was　his　favourite　way；　he　felt　her　hand　falter
on　his　arm；　and　saw　the　roses　shake。

'Will　you　let　me　give　you　one；　Mr　Clennam？　I　gathered　them　as　I　came　out
of　the　garden。　Indeed；　I　almost　gathered　them　for　you；　thinking　it　so
likely　I　might　meet　you。　Mr　Doyce　arrived　more　than　an　hour　ago；　and
told　us　you　were　walking　down。'

His　own　hand　shook；　as　he　accepted　a　rose　or　two　from　hers　and　thanked
her。　They　were　now　by　an　avenue　of　trees。　Whether　they　turned　into　it　on
his　movement　or　on　hers　matters　little。　He　never　knew　how　that　was。

'It　is　very　grave　here；'　said　Clennam；　'but　very　pleasant　at　this　hour。
Passing　along　this　deep　shade；　and　out　at　that　arch　of　light　at　the
other　end；　we　e　upon　the　ferry　and　the　cottage　by　the　best　approach；
I　think。'　In　her　simple　garden…hat　and　her　light　summer　dress；　with　her
rich　brown　hair　naturally　clustering　about　her；　and　her　wonderful　eyes
raised　to　his　for　a　moment　with　a　look　in　which　regard　for　him　and
trustfulness　in　him　were　strikingly　blended　with　a　kind　of　timid　sorrow
for　him；　she　was　so　beautiful　that　it　was　well　for　his　peace……or　ill　for
his　peace；　he　did　not　quite　know　which……that　he　had　made　that　vigorous
resolution　he　had　so　often　thought　about。

She　broke　a　momentary　silence　by　inquiring　if　he　knew　that　papa　had　been
thinking　of　another　tour　abroad？　He　said　he　had　heard　it　mentioned。　She
broke　another　momentary　silence　by　adding；　with　some　hesitation；　that
papa　had　abandoned　the　idea。

At　this；　he　thought　directly；　'they　are　to　be　married。'

'Mr　Clennam；'　she　said；　hesitating　more　timidly　yet；　and　speaking　so　low
that　he　bent　his　head　to　hear　her。　'I　should　very　much　like　to　give　you
my　confidence；　if　you　would　not　mind　having　the　goodness　to　receive
it。　I　should　have　very　much　liked　to　have　given　it　to　you　long　ago；
because……I　felt　that　you　were　being　so　much　our　friend。'

'How　can　I　be　otherwise　than　proud　of　it　at　any　time！　Pray　give　it　to
me。　Pray　trust　me。'

'I　could　never　have　been　afraid　of　trusting　you；'　she　returned；　raising
her　eyes　frankly　to　his　face。　'I　think　I　would　have　done　so　some　time
ago；　if　I　had　known　how。　But　I　scarcely　know　how；　even　now。'

'Mr　Gowan；'　said　Arthur　Clennam；　'has　reason　to　be　very　happy。　God　bless
his　wife　and　him！'

She　wept；　as　she　tried　to　thank　him。　He　reassured　her；　took　her　hand
as　it　lay　with　the　trembling　roses　in　it　on　his　arm；　took　the　remaining
roses　from　it；　and　put　it　to　his　lips。　At　that　time；　it　seemed　to　him；
he　first　finally　resigned　the　dying　hope　that　had　flickered　in　nobody's
heart　so　much　to　its　pain　and　trouble；　and　from　that　time　he　became　in
his　own　eyes；　as　to　any　similar　hope　or　prospect；　a　very　much　older　man
who　had　done　with　that　part　of　life。

He　put　the　roses　in　his　breast　and　they　walked　on　for　a　little　while；
slowly　and　silently；　under　the　umbrageous　trees。　Then　he　asked　her；　in
a　voice　of　cheerful　kindness；　was　there　anything　else　that　she　would
say　to　him　as　her　friend　and　her　father's　friend；　many　years　older　than
herself；　was　there　any　trust　she　would　repose　in　him；　any　service　she
would　ask　of　him；　any　little　aid　to　her　happiness　that　she　could　give
him　the　lasting　gratification　of　believing　it　was　in　his　power　to
render？

She　was　going　to　answer；　when　she　was　so　touched　by　some　little　hidden
sorrow　or　sympathy……what　could　it　have　been？……that　she　said；　bursting
into　tears　again：　'O　Mr　Clennam！　Good；　generous；　Mr　Clennam；　pray　tell
me　you　do　not　blame　me。'

'I　blame　you？'　said　Clennam。　'My　dearest　girl！　I　blame　you？　No！'

After　clasping　both　her　hands　upon　his　arm；　and　looking　confidentially
up　into　his　face；　with　some　hurried　words　to　the　effect　that　she　thanked
him　from　her　heart　（as　she　did；　if　it　be　the　source　of　earnestness）；　she
gradually　posed　herself；　with　now　and　then　a　word　of　encouragement
from　him；　as　they　walked　on　slowly　and　almost　silently　under　the
darkening　trees。

'And；　now；　Minnie　Gowan；'　at　length　said　Clennam；　smiling；　'will　you　ask
me　nothing？'

'Oh！　I　have　very　much　to　ask　of　you。'

'That's　well！　I　hope　so；　I　am　not　disappointed。'

'You　know　how　I　am　loved　at　home；　and　how　I　love　home。　You　can　hardly
think　it　perhaps；　dear　Mr　Clennam；'　she　spoke　with　great　agitation；
'seeing　me　going　from　it　of　my　own　free　will　and　choice；　but　I　do　so
dearly　love　it！'

'I　am　sure　of　that；'　said　Clennam。　'Can　you　suppose　I　doubt　it？'

'No；　no。　But　it　is　strange；　even　to　me；　that　loving　it　so　much　and
being　so　much　beloved　in　it；　I　can　bear　to　cast　it　away。　It　seems　so
neglectful　of　it；　so　unthankful。'

'My　dear　girl；'　said　Clennam；　'it　is　in　the　natural　progress　and　change
of　time。　All　homes　are　left　so。'

'Yes；　I　know；　but　all　homes　are　not　left　with　such　a　blank　in　them　as
there　will　be　in　mine　when　I　am　gone。　Not　that　there　is　any　scarcity　of
far　better　and　more　endearing　and　more　acplished　girls　than　I　am；　not
that　I　am　much；　but　that　they　have　made　so　much　of　me！'

Pet's　affectionate　heart　was　overcharged；　and　she　sobbed　while　she
pictured　what　would　happen。

'I　know　what　a　change　papa　will　feel　at　first；　and　I　know　that　at　first
I　cannot　be　to　him　anything　like　what　I　have　been　these　many　years。
And　it　is　then；　Mr　Clennam；　then　more　than　at　any　time；　that　I　beg　and
entreat　you　to　remember　him；　and　sometimes　to　keep　him　pany　when　you
can　spare　a　little　while；　and　to　tell　him　that　you　know　I　was　fonder
of　him　when　I　left　him；　than　I　ever　was　in　all　my　life。　For　there　is
nobody……he　told　me　so　himself　when　he　talked　to　me　this　very　day……there
is　nobody　he　likes　so　well　as　you；　or　trusts　so　much。'

A　clue　to　what　had　passed　between　the　father　and　daughter　dropped　like
a　heavy　stone　into　the　well　of　Clennam's　heart；　and　swelled　the　water
to　his　eyes。　He　said；　cheerily；　but　not　quite　so　cheerily　as　he　tried　to
say；　that　it　should　be　done……that　he　gave　her　his　faithful　promise。

'If　I　do　not　speak　of　mama；'　said　Pet；　more　moved　by；　and　more　pretty
in；　her　innocent　grief；　than　Clennam　could　trust　himself　even　to
consider……for　which　reason　he　counted　the　trees　between　them　and　the
fading　light　as　they　slowly　diminished　in　number……'it　is　because　mama
will　understand　me　better　in　this　action；　and　will　feel　my　loss　in　a
different　way；　and　will　look　forward　in　a　different　manner。　But　you　know
what　a　dear；　devoted　mother　she　is；　and　you　will　remember　her　too；　will
you　not？'

Let　Minnie　trust　him；　Clennam　said；　let　Minnie　trust　him　to　do　all　she
wished。

'And；　dear　Mr　Clennam；'　said　Minnie；　'because　papa　and　one　whom　I　need
not　name；　do　not　fully　appreciate　and　understand　one　another　yet；　as
they　will　by…and…by；　and　because　it　will　be　the　duty；　and　the　pride；
and　pleasure　of　my　new　life；　to　draw　them　to　a　better　knowledge　of　one
another；　and　to　be　a　happiness　to　one　another；　and　to　be　proud　of　one
another；　and　to　love　one　another；　both　loving　me　so　dearly；　oh；　as　you
are　a　kind；　true　man！　when　I　am　first　separated　from　home　（I　am　going　a
long　distance　away）；　try　to　reconcile　papa　to　him　a　little　more；　and　use
your　great　influence　to　keep　him　before　papa's　mind　free　from
prejudice　and　in　his　real　form。　Will　you　do　this　for　me；　as　you　are　a
noble…hearted　friend？'

Poor　Pet！　Self…deceived；　mistaken　child！　When　were　such　changes
ever　made　in　men's　natural　relations　to　one　another：　when　was　such
reconcilement　of　ingrain　differences　ever　effected！　It　has　been　tried
many　times　by　other　daughters；　Minnie；　it　has　never　succeeded；　nothing
has　ever　e　of　it　but　failure。

So　Clennam　thought。　So　he　did　not　say；　it　was　too　late。　He　bound　himself
to　do　all　she　asked；　and　she　knew　full　well　that　he　would　do　it。

They　were　now　at　the　last　tree　in　the　avenue。　She　stopped；　and　withdrew
her　arm。　Speaking　to　him　with　her　eyes　lifted　up　to　his；　and　with　the
hand　that　had　lately　rested　on　his　sleeve　trembling　by　touching　one　of
the　roses　in　his　breast　as　an　additional　appeal　to　him；　she　said：

'Dear　Mr　Clennam；　in　my　happiness……for　I　am　happy；　though　you　have　seen
me　crying……I　cannot　bear　to　leave　any　cloud　between　us。　If　you　have
anything　to　forgive　me　（not　anything　that　I　have　wilfully　done；　but　any
trouble　I　may　have　caused　you　without　meaning　it；　or　having　it　in　my
power　to　help　it）；　forgive　me　to…night　out　of　your　noble　heart！'

He　stooped　to　meet　the　guileless　face　that　met　his　without　shrinking。　He
kissed　it；　and　answered；　Heaven　knew　that　he　had　nothing　to　forgive。
As　he　stooped　to　meet　the　innocent　face　once　again；　she　whispered；
'Good…bye！'　and　he　repeated　it。　It　was　taking　leave　of　all　his　old
hopes……all　nobody's　old　restless　doubts。　They　came　out　of　the　avenue
next　moment；　arm…in…arm　as　they　had　entered　it：　and　the　trees　seemed　to
close　up　behind　them　in　the　darkness；　like　their　own　perspective　of　the
past。

The　voices　of　Mr　and　Mrs　Meagles　and　Doyce　were　audible　directly；
speaking　near　the　garden　gate。　Hearing　Pet's　name　among　them；　Clennam
called　out；　'She　is　here；　with　me。'　There　was　some　little　wondering　and
laughing　until　they　came　up；　but　as　soon　as　they　had　all　e　together；
it　ceased；　and　Pet　glided　away。

Mr　Meagles；　Doyce；　and　Clennam；　without　speaking；　walked　up　and　down
on　the　brink　of　the　river；　in　the　light　of　the　rising　moon；　for　a　few
minutes；　and　then　Doyce　lingered　behind；　and　went　into　the　house。　Mr
Meagles　and　Clennam　walked　up　and　down　together　for　a　few　minutes　more
without　speaking；　until　at　length　the　former　broke　silence。

'Arthur；'　said　he；　using　that　familiar　address　for　the　first　time　in
their　munication；　'do　you　remember　my　telling　you；　as　we　walked　up
and　down　one　hot　morning；　looking　over　the　harbour　at　Marseilles；　that
Pet's　baby　sister　who　was　dead　seemed　to　Mother　and　me　to　have　grown　as
she　had　grown；　and　changed　as　she　had　changed？'

'Very　well。'

'You　remember　my　saying　that　our　thoughts　had　never　been　able　to
separate　those　twin　sisters；　and　that；　in　our　fancy；　whatever　Pet　was；
the　other　was？'

'Yes；　very　well。'

'Arthur；'　said　Mr　Meagles；　much　subdued；　'I　carry　that　fancy　further
to…night。　I　feel　to…night；　my　dear　fellow；　as　if　you　had　loved　my　dead
child　very　tenderly；　and　had　lost　her　when　she　was　like　what　Pet　is
now。'

'Thank　you！'　murmured　Clennam；　'thank　you！'　And　pressed　his　hand。

'Will　you　e　in？'　said　Mr　Meagles；　presently。

'In　a　little　while。'

Mr　Meagles　fell　away；　and　he　was　left　alone。　When　he　had　walked　on　the
river's　brink　in　the　peaceful　moonlight　for　some　half　an　hour；　he　put
his　hand　in　his　breast　and　tenderly　took　out　the　handful　of　roses。
Perhaps　he　put　them　to　his　heart；　perhaps　he　put　them　to　his　lips；　but
certainly　he　bent　down　on　the　shore　and　gently　launched　them　on　the
flowing　river。　Pale　and　unreal　in　the　moonlight；　the　river　floated　them
away。　The　lights　were　bright　within　doors　when　he　entered；　and　the
faces　on　which　they　shone；　his　own　face　not　except